


Practice doesn't make it perfect but it's a good excuse to start

by brokentoy



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Clothed Sex, Emotional Porn, First Kiss, First Time, Friends to Lovers, Frottage, I'll teach you how to do it, Lap Sex, M/M, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, turns into I'll show you how to do it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-07
Updated: 2014-06-07
Packaged: 2018-02-03 19:02:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1754743
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brokentoy/pseuds/brokentoy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>''You just need practice.’’</p><p>‘’And how am I supposed to practice when I can’t find anyone who’d go out with me?’’</p><p>Bucky looks at him like Steve’s logic annoys him profoundly but then he lets go of Steve’s wrist and puts his hands on his shoulders instead. He looks at Steve and his eyes shine. ‘’I’ll show you,’’ he says. ‘’I’ll show you how to act with them.’’</p>
            </blockquote>





	Practice doesn't make it perfect but it's a good excuse to start

‘’You know,’’ Bucky says as he closes the door behind him, takes his shoes off and leaves them there. ‘’You don’t have to look at me like that every time I come back from a date.’’

Steve frowns at him from where’s his sitting on the couch. He’s already wearing his sleeping clothes, a pair of boxer shorts and an old cotton shirt of Bucky's, twice his size and drooping down his left shoulder. He shakes his head, looks down where he was sketching and says, ‘’I’m not looking at you like anything.’’

Bucky grins. He loosens his tie and undoes the top button of his shirt. He hangs his jacket, takes a couple of steps and then jumps over the back of their old couch until he falls right beside Steve. He looks at him up and down trying to catch his eyes. ‘’Sure you do. I can read you like an open book.’’  
  
Steve’s ears turn a darker shade of pink and he turns a little to the side, trying to hide further from Bucky’s mischievous gaze. ‘’I don’t know what you’re talking about,’’ he says, but it lacks any real conviction.

‘’Oh come on Stevie, you’re a lousy liar and you know it. You always have the same look when I come back from a night out, and it’s the same look you get when you want to know something.’’

‘’That’s not true!’’ Steve huffs, piqued. The scratch of pencil on paper becomes more insistent as he draws around the shapes he’d been working on all afternoon. Buildings and trees, views from their window. A bird in various stages of flight. That’s what he does. That’s what he’s good at.

‘’You know you only have to come with me from time to time to know how a date goes, right?’’ Bucky’s voice is teasing, but not mean. He says it softly, encouraging. ‘’I’m sure you’d like it.’’

Steve shakes his head, ‘’I have other things to think about,’’ he says.

He doesn’t have time to waste trying to get a hang on dating only for it all to come to nothing when the girls will not be interested in him anyway. He knows how this goes; he’s learned the words to this song by heart since he was ten. It’s just that he’s curious. He’s always been curious about everything and seeing how Bucky always comes home smiling and in a good mood he sometimes wonders exactly what he’s missing. He knows the basics of course but he’s never done anything like it and Bucky doesn't really give him a lot of details, except maybe when he’s drank too much and he’s in the mood for sharing the dirtiest secrets. It’s not fair to the dames, Steve knows, but when Bucky gets like this he scoots closer to Steve in bed and starts whispering about how soft a girl’s lips were and how he’d held them close to his body and Steve ends up filled with the strangest sort of yearning.

‘’But you are curious,’’ Bucky cuts into his train of thought. It is not even a question.

There’s no use in lying, so Steve nods. ‘’I am.’’

His sketchpad gets stolen out of his hands and Steve looks up, outraged. Bucky is looking at him grinning the sort of grin that doesn’t promise anything good. ‘’What?’’

Bucky’s grin gets softer. ‘’It’s not that difficult you know,’’ he says as he gently puts the pad down by the couch. He takes the pencil from Steve’s hand as well and tries to maneuver Steve into facing him. Steve goes with it, no point in resisting.

‘’What isn’t?’’ Playing dumb is not flattering, but he doesn’t really get where Bucky’s going.

‘’Charming dames. It’s not that difficult.’’

Steve laugh incredulously at that. ‘’Yeah, of course you would say that.’’ He goes to reach back for his work supplies but Bucky stops him with a hand around his wrist.

‘’I’m serious,’’ he says and looks earnest enough Steve almost believes him. Or he believes that Bucky believes it. ‘’You just be sure to do some small things right, act like a gentlemen, and they will love it.’’

‘’They don’t seem to love it when _I_ do it.’’ He doesn’t want to sound bitter, but on the few occasions Steve has talked to a girl it hadn’t gone well. He might act like a gentleman while helping someone with their groceries or offering to walk a girl home from school but on the best of days he would get straight up indifference and on the worst a tiny, indelicate laugh in his face.

Bucky scoffs dismissively, ‘’You weren’t lucky. You just need practice.’’

‘’And how am I supposed to practice when I can’t find anyone who’d go out with me?’’

Bucky looks at him like Steve’s logic annoys him profoundly but then he lets go of Steve’s wrist and puts his hands on his shoulders instead. He looks at Steve and his eyes shine. ‘’I’ll show you,’’ he says. ‘’I’ll show you how to act with them.’’

‘’I don’t think this is a good idea,’’ Steve says as he goes to stand up, but Bucky’s hands keep him still where he is. ‘’Bucky.’’

‘’Steve,’’ and Bucky’s face is softer now. His hands squeeze his shoulders and there’s reassurance there. ‘’Look at me. Let me show you this.’’’

‘’I don’t—’’

‘’Trust me,’’ and Bucky’s eyes are kind, ‘’practice can only do you good.’’

Steve absolutely doubts this, but the atmosphere around them changes and he realizes he’s nodding feebly. He’s used to following Bucky’s advice, used to trusting him unconditionally. Even though a part of him is trying to stop him from what can only be a disaster in the end, Steve can’t do much in the face of Bucky’s earnestness, of his peculiar kind of taking care of Steve in any possible way.

‘’Relax.’’ Bucky sits up, crosses his legs until he’s mirroring Steve’s position and facing him completely. ‘’Dames like confidence.’’

He looks at Steve, eyes skidding about his face until Steve flushes under the attention. ‘’You want her to feel important, okay?’’

‘’Okay,’’ Steve nods. That he can do. ‘’I can tell a girl she looks pretty.’’

Bucky smiles. ‘’Yes, you tell her that, but you tell her like she’s the prettiest girl you’ve ever seen and not just another pretty one.’’ He falls a little bit forward, his body leaning more into the shared space between them. ‘’You want to look at her like you’ve never seen anything this beautiful. Think about it.’’

Steve thinks about it. He hasn’t seen plenty of beautiful girls, not up close. The most beautiful things he’s seen in his life are the works of art at the Museum or the sun playing with shadows on the piers of Coney Island. And Bucky. He has found Bucky beautiful more than once, in that detached way he’s considered a particular painting or a statue; the clinical eye of someone appreciating beauty and finding it before him every day when he wakes up, Bucky still asleep next to him in their small bed, sun falling over his cheeks and eyelids through the window. And yet he wasn’t really so clinical about it, so detached.

He’s not gonna comment on it.

‘’Okay, I got it.’’

Bucky raises one of his hands and touches Steve’s head lightly, fingers brushing his hair. ‘’You want to drop her compliments from time to time. When she least expects it; when she’s talking to you maybe, or while you’re walking side by side.’’

Steve clears his throat. His heart is beating faster; he fidgets, doesn’t know what to do with his hands, twists his fingers in his lap.

‘’You’ll like someone for their wits and smarts, so when you find her you be sure to tell her.’’ Bucky continues to touch his hair, lost in thought. ‘’Look at her and tell her how funny she is. How intelligent.’’ The tips of his fingers rake down the side of Steve’s face slowly, following the line of his cheek, rounding on his chin as Bucky pushes it up so Steve has to look back at him.   
When he does Bucky’s eyes have lost a little of their focus, but he continues: ‘’You talk to her in this soft voice you see? Like you’re sharing a secret you’ve never told anyone else.’’

Bucky is using this very soft voice and Steve’s heart thuds against his chest in response to it.

‘’You do this with every girl?’’ He asks because he genuinely wants to know. This is a dangerous way to talk to someone. Someone might get ideas, and where they would be when it all turns out to be fake?

‘’No.’’ Bucky’s smile is a little thing curling the side of his mouth. It doesn’t last long until he continues with the slow seduction of his voice. ‘’Be sure to look at her in the eyes when you speak to her, like I’m doing.’’

Steve doesn’t say anything, doesn’t even dare moving.

‘’Do you ever think about what kind of dame you’ll love?’’ Bucky asks. The question is so completely out of the blue Steve is left confused for a second before he tries to scramble an answer together.

‘’Err— no. I don’t think so. I mean—’’ He looks to his right, to where the wallpaper is cracking around their window. He follows the pattern with his gaze, thinks about it. He’s at a complete loss. He’s never really seriously thought about the kind of woman he’ll find for himself, probably always afraid of dreaming too big. He’s never thought beyond living with Bucky; he shares his life with someone who he trusts and admires; someone he loves, of course, if it really needs a name. He’s sure thought about girls, but never so much they would take the place Bucky has in his life. ‘’No.’’

Bucky nods like it’s completely normal and not something to be scared about. Steve envies him for it.

‘’Whoever she’ll be, she will love you just as much. I’m sure.’’ The way Bucky sounds, Steve can’t find it in himself to doubt him.

‘’If you say so,’’ he says.

‘’I do.’’ Bucky scoots a bit closer. Somehow it doesn’t feel like they’re talking about how to correctly date someone anymore. Steve doesn’t know what they’re talking about, really; the only thing he knows is that Bucky is looking at him with decision in his eyes that makes his breath falter and his cheeks burn.

‘’Bucky—’’

‘’Aren’t you curious to see how you kiss someone on a date, Stevie?’’ Bucky’s voice is half a whisper but he’s so close now Steve feels each word on his skin. He doesn’t move a muscle but when Bucky continues with ‘’Do you want me to show you?’’ he feels himself nodding, head moving of its own accord up and down.

Bucky smiles brightly at that, eyes lighting with sharpening focus again. He taps a finger to Steve’s brow like he would do when they were little and Steve would do something completely predictable, unaware of Bucky knowing his game.   
  
Steve starts to understand Bucky has him exactly where he wanted him to be since the moment he came back home and he’s okay with it.

The first touch of lips is gentle, nothing more than a little pressure against his mouth. Bucky doesn’t even close his eyes and neither does Steve. It’s over as soon as it begins and then Bucky whispers ‘’now you open your mouth a little’’ and it starts again.   
  
This time the eyes close over the wet sounds they make as Bucky kisses him more deeply, sucks on Steve’s lips slowly, bites them a little. Their tongues touch; Bucky moans into it, his fingers threading into Steve’s hair and moving his head right were he needs it. Steve opens up to him without protest; he tries to imagine a woman in Bucky’s place and when he fails he stops pretending this is anything but what it really is. He sighs in happiness and starts actively reciprocating, pushes into the small space remaining between them until they’re chest to chest and he can feel Bucky’s breath push it against him, pressing them together until there’s nowhere else to go for Steve than crawl on Bucky’s lap.

He’s eager. Impatient. Moving on a rush of curiosity and desire, touching what he can with his hands and folding into the welcoming warmth of Bucky’s body.   
  
Steve is flushed and warm all over, feels the pressure of Bucky’s hands down the small of his back and gasps, breaking the kiss and panting into Bucky’s mouth with his eyes still closed.

‘’Then what—’’ he says, kissing breathlessly the side of Bucky’s lips. ‘’What do you do now?’’

Bucky hugs him even closer to him until Steve can feel Bucky is as hard as he is. ‘’I don’t know, ‘’ he says and Steve feels him shiver. ‘’This part is new for me too.’’

Then Bucky kisses him again. He steals Steve’s breath and Steve’s fine with it. He grinds down on Bucky’s dick and the pleasure makes him stupid, makes him slide his hands under Bucky’s shirt, dig his neatly trimmed fingers in the flesh until Bucky has no choice but follow his movements. They rub against each other without a real rhythm.

Steve feels feverish with want, kisses Bucky anywhere he can. Sucks on his tongue, plays with it and his lips, kisses along his jaw and down his neck nestling his nose under the shirt collar. He tries to hold on to something physical when he feels himself lose control over his body, claws at Bucky’s shirt until he grips his tie and rolls it around in his fingers.

‘’It’s good, right Stevie?’’ Bucky’s breath is hot and searing against Steve’s ear. ‘’You’re good.’’

Steve nods and bears down on Bucky’s cock, feels it hard through the thin fabric of his shorts and rides the length of it. He wants to ask if Bucky is asking him a question or stating a fact, but his brain is melting in his skull and his heart is bursting out of his chest and he’s s pulling Bucky’s tie in an effort to hold on. But then he’s coming, pulsing a sticky hot mess into his boxer shorts and biting down on Bucky’s shoulder through the cotton of his chest.

Bucky grips him by the hips and pushes up again one more time before he’s coming too, Steve’s name somewhere in between the incoherencies and profanities he lets loose as he pulses against Steve’s spent dick.

They catch their breath like that for a few minutes, hugging each other for dear life. After a while Steve stirs and grunts uncomfortably at the state of his underwear. He starts to move away but Bucky holds him tighter, blocks him within the circle of his arms.

‘’You okay?’’ he asks, voice muffled against Steve’s neck.   
  
Steve blushes violently, squirming. ‘’Yes, just— sticky.’’

‘’Nothing else?’’   
  
Bucky still doesn’t let go; he buries his face deeper, hiding from Steve’s eyes until Steve has to take him gently by his hair and pull him backwards to look at him. When he does he forgets about the uncomfortable position and in a horrified whisper says, ‘’Oh god Bucky, what’s wrong?’’

‘’Nothing,’’ Bucky sniffs, his eyes shiny and a little red.

‘’Are you crying?’’ Steve’s hands touch Bucky’s face, Bucky’s back, his hands, everything he can reach. He’s not equipped to deal with this. He doesn’t know what happened and doesn’t know how to go on from it. ‘’Why are you crying?’’

‘’I’m not,’’ Bucky sniffs wetly again, but then seems to think better of it and adds: ‘’I don’t know. I didn’t expect this.’’

Steve laughs despite the leaden worry in his stomach. ‘’Yeah, me neither.’’

Bucky looks at him, really looks at him and Steve can see the way his eyes stop at his lips. From the way they feel and tickle Steve thinks they might be as swollen and red as Bucky’s are, and they feel tender and a bit sore when Bucky touches them with the point of a finger. ‘’Are you okay?’’

‘’Yes,’’ he assures him again.

‘’Are we?’’

There’s so much in that question Steve doesn’t know how to answer properly. He searches for words and can’t find them.

He thinks he knows what Bucky did tonight. He thinks he understands where this is coming from. Maybe he wasn’t the only one feeling like he did and not knowing what to do about it, and maybe Bucky was the bravest of them both to finally try and understand. The way Bucky is looking at him speaks of fear of ruining everything they have. Steve feels that, too; deep into his bones along all his insecurities there all the times he wondered about Bucky and other people without giving himself the chance of wondering about Bucky and himself. Bucky looks afraid of Steve’s answer and that in itself is something unacceptable.

He take a deep breath and kisses Bucky again.

They’re okay. They will be okay.  

 

  
  


 

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> \- you can find me romantically vomiting ficlets and Steve/Bucky feels on tumblr @ [brokentoyinlalaland](http://brokentoyinlalaland.tumblr.com/)


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